We’ve arrived! This is a new season of parenting that I’m just not getting a handle of quickly, at all. I spent nearly the entire first year of parenthood working, worrying and waiting for our sweet girl to sleep consistently! Jordan and I talked about it more than I’d like to admit, but other than the sleep, we had it really very easy with Delaney.
She’s always been a fun, sweet, crazy little girl that can keep us entertained all day long. She’s exhausting and bossy, no doubt, but we’ve KIND OF been able to keep a gauge of her personality, what makes her tick, and how we can keep her happy.
Toddlerdom is a new world and our girl is a smarty pants to say the least! She pushes limits, tests her boundaries, and will stop at nothing to see how much we’ll let her get away with. This is normal, but it feels like our life is spiraling out of control sometimes. More than that, we’re just not sure what actions we should be taking to reel her in.
I’ve read it all and seen it all. Time outs, reasoning, ignoring, distracting, hugging, explaining etc. I’m coming into my own in the world of discipline and structure and I want to document these as we go to learn from the many mistakes that I’m positive I’ll make.
I’m reading a new book called “No Bad Kid” and I love the philosophies. Much of the book talks about the need to set limits/boundaries for our kids, treat them like actual human beings, and address our children’s tests as a means for establishing family rules. It’s really easy to abuse certain actions that work, like distracting your child away from a confrontation, giving into the screaming with their millionth cookie or whatever the obsession is that day, and even, harshly/abruptly playing the bad cop to make a poor behavior stop. I’ve gotten sucked into these things – an inconsistency that I know for a fact won’t work; but in the moment, I feel it’s my only option.
Quick fixes (and sometimes seemingly harsher, potentially longer fixes) are what got us into the vicious cycle of no sleep for a year. Yes, Delaney was a bad sleeper and that’s just the way some babies are. BUT, I know that had we implemented a more consistent structure to her wake-up time, our reactions to her midnight wakings and so on, we wouldn’t have gotten so far into the rabbit hole of sleeplessness. I’m trying to take these lessons with me as we enter the toddler years.
For now, we are setting a more strict daily routine (meal times, snack times, specific nap and wake up times) and this is something I said I’d never do. But, the alternative has proven for us that she wakes up too early and snacks allllllll day long. I hate the concept of a snack and said I would never even do them, but all of a sudden, I became the snack lady because Delaney doesn’t eat meals and has only consistently eaten berries, peanut butter, and cucumbers for the last three months! When she wants to eat, I let her. But, I despise this. Snacks have become a distraction from play and I’m tethered to the family room or being out and about because if I so much as go fill up my water cup in the kitchen, we have a pointing, whining crazy lady who will stop at nothing to get her 67th handful of craisins.
I feel some pushback from some about this concept of schedule. I used to be judgey about friends’ and families’ kid schedules too, but now I get it. While I do follow a stricter schedule than some, I have to say that I will ALWAYS under any circumstance try my very, very best to bend our rules and be flexible when it comes to special events or special visitors. I don’t want to miss out on making memories because Delaney can’t nap in the car for example. If we need to drive somewhere or she needs to sleep in a stroller, we will do it if we’ve gotten a solid week of normalcy (read: SLEEP) and you can hold me to that. But, if I have the option of doing something or being somewhere during her nap or not – you bet I’ll take the latter option.
I’m excited about this new phase of parenting but it’s definitely exhausting. She’s really so much fun and we’re hoping that by offering more stern, loving consistency at home, Delaney will be happier. A happy Laney is a happy home!
What a year, what a year! Our baby girl is 1 and we can hardly believe it. The time goes so fast but is also so full that it feels like she’s been with us forever. Delaney is the sweetest thing and becoming mom is all the more exciting and fulfilling because she is who she is (though, I’m sure every mom says that?).
The past month has brought on some much needed and appreciated consistency in our lives but also a TON OF SNOW. I feel like we’re getting to know Delaney so much better and her personality is just the best. She smiles when we get her from her crib, loves loves loves music, loves other babies, wiggles around on her play mat and is starting to bat at toys, and is pretty consistently sleeping 10 hours a night (waking up once to eat).
Bringing Up Burke 